CHANGE IS HARD

As a mother of a 7 month old son, I had to make a transition in life, going from a single gal to a mom with responsibility's. What I didnt expect was the transition I experienced going from a single gal with lots of friends, to just a few friends that I occasionally see now. I don’t know how to approach it, or if I can express to them that I am truely hurt. At the same time, inside I am so pissed – how come they don't see me anymore?

Please give me insight into my bitterness. To me it was difficult to transition to another stage of life, especially when my situation wasn't standard or ideal. I had to fight for what I stood for and changed my life around. I was alone. I made that choice and I knew I had to deal with it but I didnt expect that they didn't get it, aren't interested, and in some way ignore me and to them: that's that.

I understand that they are selfish about their time because they have not yet had to devote themselves to another human being. Their world involves around relationships with the other sex. I remember that I used to considder my life as being busy, when now I look back and think I had too much time on my hands.

Now that I'm 7,5 months further after the birth of my son, and some of (what I conssidered to be) friends haven't taken the time to actually come visit my son or even ask me how I'm doing. I send birthday cards, send mssgs how they are doing, invitations to party's I throw and they get totally ignored. I recognize this now and move forward even though part of me feels hurt and a little isolated.

When I used to get invites to socialize, go out to party's, go to BBQ's or just hang out in town, I get none of them unless I hear them talking about it and ask them 'can I come also' or when I ask them to go out this weekend. I guess they really don't wanna hang out with me anymore, for example going into town, when I have to bring my son with me.

Maybe I'll just have to see them as my 'no kids' friends and not expect them to be interested in my new life as a mother and be a part of my son's life. Unfortunately I cannot make them something they are not. The only thing I can do is wait till they have their own kids and see things from my side and maybe then express some interest in me and especially my child.